Miami International Racino?

So have you ever flown through or to the Miami airport? Better yet, have you ever tried to drive to or from the Miami airport? It is a nightmare, even for those who know it well and live there. Under construction for at least the last decade or so (at least it seems that way), every entrance or exit is a traffic accident waiting to happen--and that is before you even try to find your gate or check your luggage. Trust me. Most people find a way to fly around Miami even if it means driving a little farther to their ultimate destination.

But now comes word of a reason horse lovers might actually want to fly to Miami--the plan by county administrators to add slot machines to the airport. Trouble is, there is a provision in the state law that requires horse racing to accompany the slots. Which means that somehow, county administrators would have to operate horse races at the Miami airport!!

Truly, the concept is only totally absurd if you have ever flown to or from the Miami airport--if not, it is simply completely ludicrous. Ideally, the state law that ties slot machines to horse racing would permit the two activities to take place in two different locations, but just in case it doesn't, county administrators have proposed the creation of race track on a section of Miami International's employee parking lot!!!

Mind you, they're not thinking thoroughbreds--they require too much room--but Quarter horses. "The site is sufficient to accommodate a J-loop track that will allow for races of distances generally conducted at quarter horse race meets," reads the application on file with the state's Division of Pari-Mutuel Wagering states, according to the Miami Herald. In all honesty, could I make this up?

I get it that the slots might be able to bring in the cash needed to finally finish the construction to the airport, but can't you just see it now? "Ladies and gentlemen, we are delayed until after the fifth race. You still have time to place your bets." Or better yet, "Your flight has been canceled but if you hang around and play the slots for a while, we can probably get you on the next one."

But wait, there's more. Marc Dunbar, a lobbyist for Gulfstream Race Track (which loves the idea, especially if some of those days required to obtain slot machines at the race track are run at their facility up the road), notes that in Lexington, Kentucky, the airport is directly across the street from Keeneland.

Which somehow is all the more reason to place one in a parking lot.